Wednesday, July 21, 2004

WHY MOST MEN SOMETIMES SUCK

Disclaimer: This article is not meant to hurt or insult any men out there who get their hands on this. This is based on actual notions from women who think that men stink at times.





I have been in and out of love several times in my adolescent life. No matter how broken I became in each relationship, I never had any prejudiced thoughts on men. Maybe because I tend to understand how and why they act the way they do. And believe me, it’s not easy as believing what they say they are, yet they are not even close to how complicated a woman can get. Sure we hear a lot of men who say, “Man, I will never be able to understand women.” Hey guys, so are we. We girls try so hard to figure you out.

Most men say; women can never really make up their minds, and they think we are much more complicated than their Algebra class. Sure, we do a lot of changing, but one thing, we know what we want and we tend to let you know about it.

People I know complain about almost the same things over and over again.

Let me cite an example: a friend of mine seems to like this person, and he happens to be close to her and they are on getting to know each others stages. She knows for a fact that ”he” happens to have a liking for her; she simply went with the flow, as she says they like each other. But what makes her frustrated is that when she tries to make healthy flirty advances towards him (in which they do a lot), he turns his back. She says, “if he doesn’t want me to do things like I did, it’s better if he says something about it than lead me on. He never promised nor gave me any assurance that there is “us”, I just assumed the thing between us”. We know too, that men at times don’t like women who tend to be so aggressive; we are just trying to be true to ourselves.

There was this other instance somebody I knew told me; “I should never have done that, if only I were more compelling and responded to what she had offered, she might still be around.” What his fault was: The girl of his dreams just walked out of his life just because she thought that the beau she was digging for was not interested. He put her off when she tried to say something that signified her feelings for him. You know why? He was so damn afraid of accepting the fact that he too was falling for her and he couldn’t stand to risk because he might lose. There is nothing much to it really.

Don’t ever think that we women can’t take hints and signs; we know better. Sure, we would be hurt if you turn us down, but we won’t be that bruised. What we are asking is for you to be open towards how you feel about us. It doesn’t matter if you’re going to say that you want us only to be friends, that you don’t want any serious relationships, we would understand. What’s hard with us is that we spill the beans and we know that you have a deep feeling to pick those beans up, but you just wouldn’t. And we think this is a stupid thing. You have to give your share of letting us know where we stand; we want roles defined. We can’t simply go on babbling without knowing if that is what you want. So you better tell us soon if you are interested so we don’t come off as being annoying. Let us know if you want us to keep our feet off, we don’t want to step on your grass.

The more you open up, the better we can understand you.



The Paranoia of Being in Love

Many of you, who might get the chance to read this, will be thinking that I could have written so many articles about so many issues; yet I have chosen this one.



As one of the millions of young adults in the world, I, for one, have always been a fan for love. I love to love and to experience love no matter what the cost and the consequences. People sometimes, almost always, fear to be in a state of the “Strong Emotion” that comes between the two sexes. Well in fact, I don’t.



What is love? There can be so many definitions of love, really. On my own, I can easily define it as a deep and tender feeling or affection towards someone, and they could be just anyone. What amuses me so much about this is how we easily, (when in love with the opposite sex), devote ourselves to that certain special person. This can’t be new to you, right?



I find, in most cases of young adults that are strongly and intimately connected to someone, that they tend to be so overly possessive and jealous over their “Significant Romantic Others” or, in short, their partners. Why is this? What seems to be causing this? Why is there such a fuss about their mates when they are so much “in love” with each other? Isn’t there supposed to be much stronger and deeper bonds that connect both? When there is trust and honesty, things like this will be less likely to happen. Hey, don’t look at me; I’m only human. I am not writing any of this as if I have never experienced this kind of emotion at all; I am writing this because I, myself, am in state of “Paranoia” with my S.R.O. It is not because I don’t trust him; or do I? In fact, I do. It is only that I have been through a lot of hell and back, and the fuss that I am making is due to the fact that I am so damn afraid of losing him.



What I find funny in this relationship that I am in is: I have never experienced anything like this at all. I have never been this happy, nor have I been loved this much in my life; not even with my past ex’s, who in fact have been a@!*&%s in my life. They did not only cause me so much pain and trouble, but, in the end, destroyed everything I had made for myself. If I have to name a few: self-esteem and confidence. Gosh, given the chance to jot it all down, I would ran out of space here. Anyway, as I was saying, what makes me paranoid about it is that I really don’t know. The only existing reason I have for now is I am so, so, so, much in for this relationship, and the fact or thought of losing the guy would kill me, I can say.



Many of you out there will disagree and some of you will agree with me. How many will, I have no idea. Try to think of it; if your guy is out there somewhere, halfway around the globe and the only link you have is the internet and your cell phone: you will try everything to talk with him, send him sweet tiny notes and lovely messages. And if hugging or a touch of his hand is impossible, you’ll be paranoid right? The only thing that holds you together is the love you have and holding on to every word and promises you could make to each other. It’s not impossible, though, to make it last. The problem is: for how long you will be able to make it last. Now that scares me. I do not doubt anything, nor am I trying to push my luck so hard. But what can I do, if this stupid heart would feel the same awkward feeling and would keep on fearing that something will happen in this “gifted relationship”?



Paranoia starts when everything within you falls apart: when you cloud your mind with the unbelievable, disgusting doubts you can make. But I’m glad to have met this guy, I owe him a lot, though. I cannot speak for everything in my future, but he keeps on reassuring me that everything will turn out alright. We cannot be certain about that, but who knows?



Loving doesn’t have to be an enduring process, it is for the good of one’s self and many can reap its benefits. Though loving requires time and effort to make it last, there are so many good things you can find and learn while at it. Hey, you can get to know a person, earn yourself a “human blanket”, have a best friend, and - guess what - a brother.









you...

your love has sunk into me like a disease that has no cure, invading the whole of my system, carefully working it's way upstream destroying every bit of sanity and reasoning I have.

you and your love is the reason why, even if i lose myself, i still find me happier than life has offered me.

I believe that I exist for more reasons that i cannot know, but i do understand that there is one why i did....YOU


I love you..and only you

bitch

BITCH - Webster defines as a lewd and promiscous woman; malicious

and bad tempered;aggressive;anything specially unpleasant or difficult.

But I proudly call myself a bitch, that doesn't mean I am unpleasant

and difficult. Only that I am not afraid to speak my mind. Ruthless,

I may be branded as one, but only when it is called for.



I strongly define a Bitch as someone who is confident, gutsy, proud but

not overbearing. She may be unpleasant to others because they cannot

stand being with someone who is very sure of herself.



Being a dominant personality, people find me intimidating, they branded

me with many names, yes a bitch, certified, hard to the core bitch and proud

of it. I am stubborn and strong-willed, driven, I am not afraid to

speak my mind, and I don't bow down to anybody lesser than me.



I respect those who can capture my attention, who can impress me with

their abilities, seldom can I find people who doesn't have to try so

hard to leave their imprints on people.



Those I find worthy of that gaze I let them in in my chosen circle,

to those I find unworthy, they have to find something else rather than

waste my time.



I am not afraid of anyone except to the one who is above me. I stand by my

principles and I stick to what I believe in. Right or Wrong, black and white.



I have the tendency to freeze the shallow and unworthy. As if they don't exist.



What do I have to do? I am a bitch by my own right. Right?

Who Is He?

No doubt, I am in love, and I am happy about “us”. Yet how can someone who says she is happy and still feel pain at the same time?

Happy in the sense that no man has ever touch the core of me like he did. When he came into my life everything was just plain and gray, now, he put all those lively colors and brought life to into my sad eyes. He shed light to my darkened alleys, sunrise to my mornings, even moonlight to my dark, gloomy nights.

He loves me without conditions, accepted me without hesitations and embraces all of me with great conviction and beyond reason. What more could I ask for? I suppose there is none. But it’s hypocrisy to say so because there is one. Him. I want him. All of him.

It pains me to know that I can share my life with him and his to mine, yet we cannot be together…as of the moment anyway. He is close to me yet so far. It is like reaching out your hand to clasp his, only there is an invisible glass in-between.

He, the man who made me smile, laugh and cry. He, who made me sing even the odd melodies and out of tune and out of line, he, who made me go on and strive.

He. Who is he? He is the one I will give anything just to spend my lifetime with.

He is the one I chose to fall in love with and allowed to take off all of my masks. I made him see the real me.

I took such risk of loving someone without even knowing where it will lead. I hope that today is the tomorrow that I want to see.



The day that he can forever be with me.



A WOMAN TO LOVE

Sure, I am not perfect, and I am not sculpted accordingly to the worlds standards of women (according to the fashionists). Yet I am created to perfection according to God. His own will and for His own pleasure.



Other people treat me like a princess, others with sheer respect and gentleness... other don't. They just..neglect me. Why? because I love them so that they want to take advantage of it. Sige lang. okay lang. Ayoko sana magpakamartyr kasi naman namamatay eh. Huh..some people are just mere opportunists who wants to take advantage of what was little left of other peoples self-esteem. Ganun na nga...



I am good, I am sensible, I am created to please. If you cannot appreciate me then let me go in the same condition you got me. Not a broken and torn to pieces kinda thingy.



I am a woman to love, you'll see, when you let me go you will realize what I am to you. When I decide to leave, you will know what you have lost...

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